|
Commentsglad you explained that Laura so I can stop being angry with "people" and know it's just a machine doing havoc. Wish those who send all the spam realized that all we do is get programs to eliminate it. The internet is no way to send your junk mail - we find a way to dump it. Anyway, I've got Abby for awhile and we had a ball last night at Kid's Karoke in Lawrenceville. She sang three songs, starting with "Redneck Woman". She blew the audience away. I've never seen a seven year old who loves to get in front of an audience and more people the better she does. The last song she sang was after the adults were coming in and she said that she could see that they weren't paying attention, so she got good and loud until they looked at her. She may be the one who fulfills my dreams of "Hollywood". Everyone came over and told her how much talent she has. When we left she said "That was a dream come true!" I guess we'll go to Billy's today and swim for awhile. She will enjoy Drew. Lauren is with her "older" friends. Abby doesn't mind. She can play with Drew just as well.
CommentsWell Abby practices every day. She sings and she writes. She writes songs and performs them. She writes them in the format that professionals do. I can't speak about it really because I don't know the lingo. She does though. Abby will say, "this is the chorus" or the...I can't think of the word...Oh "the hook." She is so funny. She looks up lyrics on the internet and studies the structure of songs and then constructs songs and performs them in her original tunes and beats. She is even talented beyond singing and performing. But, her family knows all that.
CommentsI've managed to trade Dylan Sat. night for Lauren, Drew and Abby Sunday night. We played "Ice Cream Parlor". We went to Walmart and everyone chose what they wanted - three types of ice cream, chocolate sauce, caramel sauce, whipped cream, cherries, sprinkles, marshmallows, bananas, - then we came home and they made their own sundaes and we watched "The Pacifier". As good as it gets!
CommentsGood thing I'm not a poker-addict-gambler or this could be tempting.
CommentsI forgot to add...Ansley is saying, "mmmmmmamamama." Oh, the sweet sound. I have never heard in reference to me, although I'm on my third child as a parent. Of course, I heard Conner's sweet sounds as I moved his lips together and I knew he was saying, "momma" when he'd say "nanana." But I just sit in my room and listen to her as she cries over the monitor wanting me to come get her out of bed when she is supposed to be napping, screaming "mmmmmmah-mah-mah-mah-mahmmmmmmmmah-mah-mah-mah." And I smile and I love it. She can speak and she can wail. She can stand and she hit the side of her bed. And she can scream, "mama." Nice.
CommentsWell, Abby and I went to the mall today and met Shannon and her kids. We had lunch then bought a new outfit for tomorrow night's Karaoke. Then we went to Toys R Us and got a couple of games and came home and played them. After our spaghetti dinner, she fell asleep (6:30PM) Poor little thing is worn out! She's been singing and practicing her "modeling" moves. I'm having a ball "training" my little doll.
CommentsI'm excited to go to Six Flags on Thursday. I am actually leaving Statesboro for a week. I am lucky to have all the programs covered and worked. Conner's Place has a great group of reliable people working all of our programs. I never have to worry about the people I work with. Unless they have warned me at least a week or two ahead of time, they are always on time and at work ready to go. In addition to my trusty facilitators, I have extra university students helping. Conner's Place is so enriched with loads of quality people and I can LEAVE and stay gone a week without anything missing. That is a dream. Okay, baby is crying at 12:30 am. I thought I was home free for the night. Okay, she's quiet. And tomorrow I am going to a child abuse conference and I get to stay in a nice hotel in Atlanta while momma watches the babies. I will feel like I am on vacation! Okay, baby is really crying. Must go.
CommentsHey Betsey, Just thinking of you all on this special day! I know your sweet angel is in heaven doing a special dance on this oh so special day!! I hope you have a wonderful day!!
CommentsWe have had a great Conner Celebration. On his birthday, Abby, Grammy, Brandon, me and Tara (Conner's girlfriend) went to the Singin' Bean to do karaoke. Abby sang a special angel song just for Conner on his birthday. Abby and I sang a song together. I was not good at all. But Abby and Brandon did a duet and Brandon was HORRIBLE!!!!!!!! You cannot even imagine how bad he sings. Its not "singing" really. Everybody clapped and cheered for his effort. Then today we went to Six Flags. For anyone who has a sick child and then loses a child, he or she knows how hard it is to be out amongst so many kids. I mean even though I have kids and I know how lucky I am, I can't help but think about my son who is supposed to be there with me but isn't. Despite that fact that will never change, I enjoyed celebrating Conner's life and birthday with the family and with the kids. We love him and talked about him (we always do) and we remembered his preciousness. Happy Birthday, Baby. Mommy loves you and misses you. I think of you every day, as you know. If you could communicate with me, I know you'd be talking about Drew and the log ride. Love, love, love all day every day! OH and Lisa, I guess this means Karis won't share Conner's birthday.
CommentsWow..yeah Brandon was horrible..I laughed so hard..which was good because I was crying before that..Abby sang Concrete Angel for Conner..I miss him so much! I actually haven't gone to the karaoke place yet..maybe I should sing with Brandon..I might sound better. Haha. But anyway, I just wanted to say I loooove Conner and miss him so much! He would have had fun with us at Six Flags today. We got soo wet..well, Brandon splashed me and that's the wettest I got, everyone else was soaked. And I went to the age-guessing thingamabob and he thought I was seventeen..and I said "Noo.."..haha. But enough about me..haha..
CommentsI say haha too much.
CommentsConner's birthday was perfect. Abby was determined to sing a song for him. They didn't have "Fly" by Celine Dion, so she sang Concrete Angel. Well, we all know that Conner wasn't "abused", but it was a sweet song and she managed to hold back the tears. She explained to the audience that it was for her cousin who died of SMA when he was two. How sweet. Ansley and I have had some bonding time this week. She is adorable. Abby was a big help with her. I am going to miss my girls when they leave, but I know that Drew and Lauren and Dylan are a phone call away. Drew is such a sweet little thing and makes us wonder what Conner's personality would have been like at this age. I plan to rest for a couple of days, then head for SC.
CommentsAnsley has a new noise-a horrible, screeching noise where she is breathing in like she is screaming and gasping for air. Its horrible, but she loves it and now does it ALL THE TIME and laughs at herself. I am so excited. I get to be on a morning show. I'm so afraid of making a fool out of myself. I think if I'm just really prepared, I won't say something stupid. I'm going to talk about project lifesaver. Its a tracking device and transmitter for people who may wander. I wish I could place one in Abby and Ansley's skulls. Anyway, its a good program and I'm excited to go talk about it. I've done lots of interviews, but when I see them, I know I'm just really am not very photogenic. I need an ambush makeover. I want to look credible, not messy. Anyway, the important thing is getting the word out, so I'll focus on that.
CommentsOH!!! I forgot to say, congratulations to Lisa for having a healthy Karis. Sounds like she was the size of Ansley when she was born. About 8 pounds and a little over 21 inches. Lets hope she doesn't get quite as fat as Ansley has.
CommentsWell, Dylan has been entertaining me for the last couple of nights and days. He's such a sweetie and an easy baby to handle. He reminds me of Billy as a baby...that little round almost bald head and the brown eyes that just look into your soul. He has Bill's little dimpled chin. But much of the time he looks like the O'neals with Billy's coloring. He can make the cutest little faces and sounds. He's not ready to stand or walk, just goes wherever he wants on his knees. He seldom cries - of course at my house babies don't have to cry because they get whatever they want whenever they want it. Abby is going to start voice lessons in a couple of weeks. And she has been accepted to the Quest program at school this year. I'm so proud of her. Drew started his football practice Monday and enjoying it so far. Lauren continues with her social life - malls, movies and telephone calls. I gave her some books on acting because she says she's interested in taking drama courses this year. She could be very good. She's a very expressive reader.
CommentsCongratulations Lisa! Sounds like you you have a healthy (and big) baby girl. I can't seem to get to the pictures you say you posted but I look forward to seeing them. If Karis gets big like Ansley, you an' Betsey can be on Maury together. Tell Dan I said hey. And double congratulations to Gina and John. I'm so happy for the both of ya'll. Hey to all the Carlisles and everybody else. I would have paid top dollar to have seen the Karaoke performance.
CommentsYes, John, it was quite a performance, well worth top dollar. But, hey, I have it on tape, how much will you pay for the tape? Just kiddin'. I'll bring it the next time I go to Statesboro and we'll have a "viewing". How is Miss Lucie doing? Betsey told me she has been in the hospital - our prayers are with her. She's a fine lady and a good person. I'm sure her students are keeping her deluged with "pictures" and greetings. Love to all the Riggs group. How's MaMa?
CommentsLucie is recovering well at home. She has both her kids takin' care of her. She'll be very happy ya'll asked about her. MaMa is doin' well also. She is diligently going to rehabilitation for whatever ails her. I'll tell her you asked. I look forward to seeing the video of Abby singing. How are Mema and PopPop?
CommentsJust checking to see if we are back in business with the site. It's been down for awhile trying to clean up the spamming mess, I guess.
CommentsI had a dream about Conner last night. I'd move him from one room to the other being very careful with his neck. Sweet baby. Ansley is developing into her own little stubborn self. Like mom and dad.
CommentsHi Betsy, I saw you on TV, I think it was last week or the week before with the sheriff. You looked GREAT and also did a GREAT job.
CommentsThank you. I was a little nervous. It was nice to be on tv for something that saves lives for a change. Its very rewarding for me to talk about solutions. I think it is for everybody.
CommentsLooks like we're up and running again. Kids back in school. Everyone seems to be settling in with a new year. Billy's new office will soon be ready to occupy - but first we all go to the beach on Sat. Can't wait to get to the ocean and be with all the kids and grandkids. It'll be fun to watch Dylan and Ansley - both trying to walk and talk and out "cute" each other. It's impossible to choose who's the cutest - they are both adorable and funny and sweet. Gotta give it to Ansley for "feisty" and Dylan for "easy". Hope everyone out there is doing well. How are my Riggs' boys? Gotta plan a video viewing in Statesboro. How about it, John?
CommentsHaven't heard from any of you lately. Is everything okay?????
CommentsHi everyone, We're ok. Had a good time at the beach. A little excitement with the hurricane winds and waves, but we were fine. The dead fish were pretty stinky and most of the things we wanted to do were closed, but in spite of everything the best part was having Billy, Betsey and families together with Gary and me. We loved getting up in the morning and having Dylan and Ansley play while we drank coffee and watched them try to out do each other. They are both on the verge of walking, but neither one is ready to take off yet. Abby just got a very good report on her reading progress. In the beginning of the second grade, she's readin on a fourth grade level. She's also going to start her voice lessons. Drew and Lauren are excited to learn that they are going to have a new "sibling". So Dylan gets to be a middle child instead of the baby.
CommentsDylan is now 1 year old! Ansley will soon follow. Betsey is having trouble posting on the board so I'll just say that she's fine. She and Ansley will be coming up here Tues. Ansley stays with me while Betsey goes to some kind of meetings. I look forward to having the little "livewire". I'm resting up for her. She'll be fine. She always does well for me. I'm just getting too old to chase the little ones. Dylan wore me out crawling up the stairs - over and over. He looks back to be sure I'm behind him, then he just laughs and scoot right up. It's just so wonder for them to be healthy and able to get around like that. WE don't take it for granted at all. I still see little Conner lying there watching as the kids jumped around in front of him - only able to move his eyes and make his annoyed sounds - wanting them to move from in front of his TV! I miss him still and will never stop. I only hope he's taking care of Uncle Jeff for me. I guess in heaven all things are possible.
CommentsHey Ya'll, Yes Sandee, we need to have a viewing of Abby's performance. Let me know. Make sure you save the tape. It'll be worth money someday. Sounds like Lauren may also go "Hollywood". I really miss Conner too.
CommentsHello, Hope everyone is doing fine. Was that Abby and Ansley I saw in the Statesboro Herald's Photo Gallery? They looked so CUTE!!!
CommentsYes, that was Abby and Ansley. They are precious, arent they? Grandma's like to brag!
CommentsHope everyone is well and happy. The children were at my house for my birthday Friday (Abby, Lauren and Drew) We went to the Singin Bean and to the fair on Sat. Dylan joined us Sat. night. We missed having Ansley. Distance prevents. I'd like to request that you folks out there say a prayer for my friend Gayle who is in intensive care in Columbus. She has a difficult time ahead with chemo and will need all the well wishes and prayers we can provide. Shannon is doing well with her pregnancy. We'd love another little girl, but the boys are so sweet that that would be fine, also.
CommentsBrandon finally figured out for me why I couldn't post on here. I could pull up the page and read stuff but never post. Anyway, he helped me and now I can. Ansley is having her 1st birthday party this weekend. Of course she is having an Elmo theme. I was going to try to do a more feminine theme, but Elmo is her favorite and the store didn't have any cabbage patch kid piņatas. So, Ansley is having her Elmo party. I got her an Elmo costume and she HATES IT!!! She freaks out crying and looks ten times cuter crying in the costume. Abby is more excited about Ansley's party than Ansley is. Abby picked out party stuff and presents. She told everyone in Wal-mart that her sister was turning 1. We are very excited. I had a good day, but mysteriously busted out crying while I was rocking the big baby. She made some sounds that sounded just like Conner and then the whole elmo and birthday shopping spree ran through my head. No more crying, though. Anytime there are milestones I cry. I guess I would anyway. Okay, we're happy and thankful that we're healthy.
CommentsCan't believe it's been a year. Ansley is a total individual. She and Dylan are just alike when it comes to development - but totally different when it comes to personality and looks. They will be able to complement each other as buddies - I just picture them growing up together and giving each other advice as they grow older. Ansley will be telling Dylan how to be more outgoing and Dylan will be telling Ansley to "rein it in". How cute. We are all so very thankful for good health.
CommentsHappy Birthday, Ansley. Mommy loves you. I love all my babies (that includes my big girl).
CommentsAnsley had her first year appt. She is 26 lbs and 30 in. She did great getting her shots. She took them like a big girl. Tonight I was rocking her and had her head on my shoulder. She lifted her head up and kissed me and put her head down. Then she did it again. Then again. Oh, how precious. What a dream come true! She kisses me all the time, but that was a special moment. That's when I close my eyes and feel like I'm holding Conner. That sounds kinda crazy, but that's how I deal with it. Before he died, I knew that I would connect with him in the future by holding other kids and closing my eyes and pretend I'm holding him. So, sometimes I hold her and pretend she's him, yes I do. I won't take it to a weird level, I promise. Anyway, sometimes when she's sleeping and I check on her, her arm and hand are hanging out of her crib. I sit on the floor by her hand and close my eyes and rub her hand against my cheek like I used to do with Conner's. Her hand is so soft, like his, and limp-only because she's sleeping. I pull out her fingers one at a time, like I used to do. It's like a little visit. I pray every time I think about it to preserve the safety of all of my family members. I just can't imagine losing anyone else. That's it. I feel better. I vented.
CommentsI know what you mean, baby. Sometimes when I'm hugging Billy, I pretend I'm hugging Jeff. I just want to "feel" him. I, too, pray that I will never have to lose another loved one and know that I will. Death is inevitable. I just won't be able to handle it if it's someone younger than me. I'll accept the natural order of things, as will you.
CommentsEverything is busy. Work, kids-family. What else is there? I go to work to get a break from the kids and come home to get a break from work. I guess I have achieved my life long dream of being "normal."
CommentsI guess it's ok if you're normal. But remember - you are not average! You're way above average and you're quirky enough to be very interesting and fun. Looking forward to Abby's birthday party next Saturday. Always fun to see Abby happy! But then, she has no trouble staying that way. I hope Lauren and Drew and Dylan will be able to be at the party.
CommentsI am so excited. I have a new work possibility tomorrow. I think I'll do well, but when you put yourself out there you risk huge embarrassment and failure. HOWEVER, I have done so many embarrassing-hugely embarrassing things-that messing up during a consultation can't be that bad. The worst part is after the consultation when you submit your fees. That's when you really put yourself out there because you actually put a price on yourself. You have to assess your professional value, AND time with your family, your other clients, and yourself all has to evaluated. Also I am excited because Abby's birthday is coming up. It is forcing me to clean up and go through stuff that I have put off. As momma knows, it is so hard to go through stuff. I always end up crying. Today, I found the letter Jeff wrote to Abby when I was pregnant explaining to her that we all would love her just as much when Ansley was born and that she wouldn't lose any love or attention. It was a very sweet letter. I'm glad he wrote it although Abby has been so gracious with Ansley and sharing attention. Regardless, I have to get the playroom cleaned out so it can be a real playroom instead of a toy storage room.
CommentsJust invite me down - you know I could have you cleaned up and organized in no time. :)
CommentsAlison, you are invited and I won't ask you to clean! AND it went great today!!! I am so excited. I am breaking into the corporate training arena. I have been wanting to but it is difficult to market without a marketing budget. I am building a little marketing budget and trying to develop some strategies. I already know I can do the work. I just need other people to know that. Anyway, Alison, would you actually come down for Abby's party????
CommentsGrammy is down and we are cleaning up, getting ready for Abby's party. Abby is not feeling well, however. I hope she has a minor thing, but I'm afraid it will manifest into something more by tomorrow afternoon. Momma made it through the day yesterday (Jeff's day). I am glad you were with us, Momma. Abby is going to have an exciting birthday. She is getting a real DJ mixer, digital something where she can have her microphone and headphones, and she can blend music and sing to it and do other stuff I have no idea about. I am going to have to find a real DJ to come over and teach her how to use all the little things on it. We can figure out a lot of it, but I am sure a DJ could show her the really cool stuff. Its her own little mixing, music studio. We're cleaning out the playroom to set her up her DJ booth. I can't wait to see her face when she figures out what her DJ thing is. The baby is going to have a great time dancing to sissy's music. She's great at doing the hokey pokey.
Commentsansley is dying to write......vbhm gvm hhhhhhhhgffd b uoukogh yjhyhhuyhihgbhgh bn n bnnbnnvb v ggvtfyfrtftfbngbvgvhghbvgvvvvvvvvvvvggggggggvggvvvvvvvvbvgggvg
CommentsHi Betsey, Grammy, and everyone: I just wanted to check in. How awesome that Ansley turned one! Has it really been that long since she was born? Time certainly flies. I would love to see some new pictures if you ever get the chance to post them. I know you are so busy. It sounds like your business has really taken off and I'm so happy for you! I wish you and your family all of the happiness in the world. I know Conner is so proud of his Mommy. Well, after going into pre-term labor at 30 weeks, a hospital stay, and bed rest since being released, I am happy to report that I am 36 weeks pregnant tomorrow! YAY! 36 weeks is a wonderful marker for a twin pregnancy as they are out of danger (cross fingers) for major prematurity issues. I feel so relieved! I have to have a c-section b/c one baby is breech and the other is transverse and at this point they have no room to make a turn. If I do not labor on my own by December 2, then that is the day they will induce me. I can hardly believe it!! I am SO excited! I feel pretty big too so I wouldn't mind to get a little relief from that. I will happily make the transition from being majorly uncomfortable to being sleep deprived :o). I have thought about Andrew often. And Conner too. I wonder how it will be to have my two boys with me and him in heaven. hmmm.... Anyway, I'm glad everything seems to be going well in your neck of the woods. Take care guys. Love, Gina
CommentsBy the way, did you catch Extreme Makeover Home Edition last night on ABC? They made over the Johnson family's home who has a child with SMA II. It was awesome! I hope you were able to see it.
CommentsI am so glad to hear you are coming along and babies are good. I can't wait to hear that they are born and everything is good. What I think about with Ansley and Conner is that she would have been so interested in all of his "stuff." And he would have smiled at her when she made funny noises and frowned when she screamed and smacked him in the face (patting). I don't know how I would have kept her out of all of his stuff. She would have already pulled out his g-tube for sure. And I DID see the Johnson family. It really is interesting seeing what a house specifically built for an sma child would be like. I empathized with the parents and was amazed by the siblings. And the child was precious! I wish they could have captured some of the care, but really its great that the disease was exposed to so many people. I'll try to get some pictures up.
CommentsAbby performed tonight! She had her recital at the Emma Kelly Theater. She sang, "Oh Atlanta" and she was so good. Thank goodness. She has always loved to sing and loved music. I was so fearful she wouldn't be able to sing and be one of those people like on American Idol. But thank goodness she is talented! I couldn't have been more proud. She worked hard and did it. What guts it takes to stand on a stage in front of all those people and sing. Its great to see her work and overcome nerves and then, succeed. Anytime you ask Abby what she wants to be when she grows up, she says, " a star." Of course, we say, "and what else? a teacher, lawyer, etc." Tonight she said, "I did it. I am a star." What a great feeling.
CommentsHope all the little angels out there are looking forward to Santa and will enjoy their families and all the love they will be surrounded with. I'm looking forward to seeing that crazy little girl of ours tearing at the presents and wondering what in the world is going on. Dylan will watch her with wonder. I think he's a little mystified by her. We are all under her spell. Abby is doing so well. Such a big, smart pretty girl.
CommentsThere are new pictures on the site. Actually a couple are a couple of months old, but... they are growing up fast.
CommentsHey Betsey, you have such a beautiful family, I am so happy for you!! I thought Ansley looked just like Brandon but after looking at these new pictures I definitely see the Carlisle in her. Hope you all have a Merry Christmas! If you are in ATL call me we will be up there until Jan 2nd. and we can let our girls meet and play!!
CommentsWe'll be up after Christmas. I'll let you know so we can visit. I'd love to see how the baby has grown. Ansley started at daycare yesterday-her first day. She was fine, but I was about to cry. She had been with a sitter at home, but that didn't work out. Although, at home we had to worry about the sitter not showing because of sickness or something, but with daycare you have to worry about the kid not being able to go because of sickness. Anyway, they had to just tell me bye today because they could see I was beginning to loiter. I wanted to stay and play with her. But, I had to go, and she was fine. Yesterday, she told me bye and played and totally ignored me as I tearfully left. Now, here I am at work writing about it instead of doing what I need to be doing. Okay, I am so glad she is independent. I love my babies.
CommentsAnother year. Hmmm. It's been a pretty good year. We're celebrating with Ansley tonight. She'll be asleep way before the celebration. I probably will be, too. I hope this year is a happy one. I pray for health and happiness for everyone. I guess that's not possible, but it's worth a try. One more year of plowing forward to bigger and better things. I am pretty satisfied, though, with two precious, sweet, stubborn girls and a sweet and stubborn husband. I am very lucky. Thank you, God, for my life despite all of the pain. I still don't think Conner's pain was worth anything else that I have in my life, but I can't control that. I can only appreciate what I have now and know that Conner's life was very important and is the reason I get up and go to work and live everyday!
CommentsThe year has good so far. Day by day. Brandon is trying to buy the local gym and things are going in a positive direction. It fits him well. He's educated and experienced as a good business man and he loves to work out. He'll make it work. He's good at that. Mom and I are going to see John Edward in May. We're going to be in the gallery. For anyone who knows who John Edward is, you know what the gallery is. It'll be neat even if he doesn't get our "vibes." It is very entertaining and exciting. Jeff and I used to watch John Edward on tv and it was understood that if one of us died, the other would try to break through with some kind of message. Well, needless to say, I get messages loud and clear, but he would think it was so cool that we were meeting John Edward. We had our differing degrees of skepticism, but overall, it's just interesting and cool to check out mysterious things first hand. Also, I had my surgery today. VERY MINOR! I just had a little piece of my arm cut out. They're going to test it and make sure its fine, but even if it weren't, its not there anymore, so....I'm sure its nothing. Other than being chunky and a little stressed, my health is pretty good. Although, if I don't work on the chunky part, I'll get more stressed. Abby's going to sing at her "club" this weekend. She's excited to perform. Gotta go to sleep.
CommentsWell, the doctor called me today and said the part he took out was cancer, BUT its gone, so its not big deal. A lot of people have stuff like that. Okay, baby's crying.
CommentsWell, I get my stitches out today. Ansley has been sick. She doesn't act lethargic though. When she's sick she acts even more hyper and SUPER FUSSY!!!! Right now she has banana smeared everywhere mixed with her nose dripping snot and she's clapping and yelling, MAMAMAMAMAMA, OOOOHHHHH, AAYYYYYYY! Can't she just be tired? I am. Oh, goodness. Time to get out. She wants my coffee cup.
CommentsAnsley is back to normal with a little coughing still. She slept pretty well last night, so we're all a little better today. So, I went to the doctor yesterday and he told me my piece of arm was benign. I thought you said it was cancer? Oh, no, it's not. Sorry for the misunderstanding. What??? Well, that's great because I don't have to worry about it. And when I found out or thought I found out what really wasn't true, I started eating really good, drinking only one diet coke a day, exercising and taking my vitamins. And I feel great. I feel even greater to not have cancer looming over me, but what in the....??? It was actually just what I needed to motivate me to get my butt in the gym.
CommentsAnsley has been possessed by an evil spirit. I think its the evil spirit of the terrible twos. It has possessed her early, but its here full strength. I tried to exorcise the demon out by sitting her in time out for a half of minute and tell her no, but she has NO IDEA what that's all about. Or her current evilness doesn't care. Regardless, I hope when her group of teeth come in, she'll be a little better. She is horrible!!! She's pretty cute when she's at her worst. Last night, we were all trying to keep a straight face while I was telling her firmly, NO, and Abby just busted out laughing and I turned and laughed. And forget being in a hurry or talking on the phone. That's ridiculous. Right before we leave, you can be sure that she's pooped in her pants. Or that she won't eat her food, but throw it all over the kitchen. Or cry through naptime. I can't imagine what the terrible twos are going to be like if she's already being like this. I am going to have to pull out the books and read what it says about how to respond to her physical and verbal "attacks". She's talking with a tone instead of trying to say words. She'll use the right number of syllables and inflection in her voice to ask for what she wants, but won't try to form the word. Sometimes, she'll bust out and say, "GO." Oh well, overall she's got some good attributes. So, we'll cling to those while she's possessed.
CommentsOkay, maybe she's not possessed anymore. We were all sick and now we're better. I had some 24 hour virus or something and I wanted to die yesterday. But, I felt superb today. Abby is so excited about going on a field trip tomorrow. She is so concerned that I won't make it. She has asked me probably 5 times each day for the last 5 days AT LEAST!! if I will be there at 8:20, not 8:31 because that will be too late. She reluctantly trusted me as I tucked her in and she asked one more time, "Now, what time are getting there tomorrow? Not 8:31, right?" Anyway, it would not be good if I was rear-ended or something on the way from Ansley's daycare to Abby's school. I must get up in time and drive carefully. So, good night!
CommentsSo, the day of Abby's field trip, I got to her school about 8:22 and walked in the office and checked in. As I was walking down the hall, Abby cam out of her classroom and hugged me and started crying. I asked her why she was crying and she said she thought I wasn't coming. She said she thought I got in a "car crash." My goodness. These are the times when Abby's insecurities come out. She always seems so well-adjusted, but this is the evidence that you can lose both of your parents (her mom is still alive, but away) and not have any issues. I remember feeling the way she did when my mom would leave after my dad died. I would be so afraid that she would leave and never come back-like he did. Now, I've lost enough people so close to me that I don't worry about what happens because its so possible. I just worry about trying to keep us as safe as possible as much as I have control. That's not too much most times. I have no agreements with God. I may have thought at one time we did, but I understand that that's a little arrogant of me. I just pray for a little mercy everyday and I'm thankful for what I can get. I'm pretty lucky. I'm the happiest I've ever been with all the saddest stuff in my head.
Commentsmeant to say-"can't lose both of your parents" ---Also, we went to the Gretchen Wilson concert. Abby loved it. She was in her element. Her favorite part was when Gretchen Wilson sang a Led Zepplin song. It was a good show and Abby is inspired.
CommentsToday was like any other Saturday. Wake up, go to the Silver Lining Club (Alzheimer's Program-I'm the director), go by the office and get the deposit for the bank from the family violence program, go change the batteries on a transmitter of an Alzheimer's person, get home, put baby to sleep, watch a movie, play with baby, feed the family. Now what? Maybe I'll get some laundry done, maybe not. Brandon is actually working on that. I thought he'd ignore my request, but he always seems to surprise me. He got me an engagement ring for our anniversary/Valentine's Day. It is a beautiful, antique looking ring. I was shocked. I just don't think about things like that. How luxurious. Thanks mom for coming down and taking care of my kids and cleaning my kitchen and keeping me company these past couple of days. I really appreciate this time. I realize that this is a good time. And then-change. I will appreciate the good times while they last. Today is a good day.
CommentsI enjoyed my visit with the Statesboro branch of my family. Did you mean Lynard Skynard instead of Led Zeplin? Love to my crazy "Lucy" (Ansley) and my lovely songbird, Abby.
CommentsThis time I actually meant Led Zeppelin instead of Lynyrd Skynyrd. Gretchen Wilson sang Black Dog. That wasn't a favorite of mine from them. My favorite is All of my Love. What a song that brings back the memories of being about Abby's age. I loved that song so much it hurt my little, romantic, fairy tale guts.
CommentsHey Guys, It's Gina...checking in. Just wanted to let you know that Brayden West and Luke Bowen were born on December 2nd at 10:22 and 10:23 (c-section). Brayden weighed 5lbs, 10oz and little Luke was 4lbs, 5oz. Thankfully, and by the grace of God, neither of them spent any time in the NICU. I was afraid of that. They will be 11 weeks old tomorrow and life is good. CRAZY but good. Taking care of two babies is a challenge but I'm thankful for every minute. I'd love for you to see pictures. I don't know if I still have your email. Tomorrow marks 5 years since Andrew's passing. Hard to believe it's been that long but then again it seems like ages ago. Life is strange that way. I miss him more than words - you know what I mean. Glad to see everything is going well in your neck of the woods. Love to all of you, Gina P.S. Did you hear about Payton? I'm sure you did. :o(
CommentsI didn't hear about Payton. I guess I'm afraid of hearing about the kids. We know the pain and its just hard to see others go through it. On the other hand, I know how bitter sweet the birth of the new babies are. How absolutely wonderful and exciting. Can you see Andrew in them? Thanks so much for writing on Conner's site and keeping us updated! I would love to see pictures!
CommentsIt is really hard to know that other people are losing babies the way Conner died. When your taking care of the sick baby your perception of comfort is warped. You think, I only had to stick a plastic catheter that feels like an explosion in your sinuses up your nose twice today instead of ten times. The whole suffering thing just makes me physically ill and cranky. That's one of the things that keeps me from falling asleep at night. If its too quiet, I start thinking about things like that. I start thinking about how many times Conner was clogged up and deprived of oxygen for so long he turned grey and passed out. That's how it feels to die. He had to feel that over and over. That makes me sick. AND OTHER BABIES ARE going through this everyday and dying. You are forced to appreciate your new babies who can go days, weeks, years, a lifetime without ever suffering the way Conner did. Ansley thinks she is suffering at those same depths, and I have to be sensitive to that. But that just makes how Conner handled his suffering that much more amazing to me.
CommentsI am so glad that my appreciation for Ansley from Conner's physical inabilities have rubbed off on Brandon. She was snuggling with him and tracing his face and saying, "Daddy." It was so sweet and, of course, Brandon cried. He remembers what it was like with Conner and how frustrating it was to see the baby unable to snuggle. I do remember how wonderful it was putting Conner on my chest and hugging him. I would cry then. Conner LOVED IT. Snuggles and hugs are so important.
CommentsI'm missing you, Conner! I think about you everyday. Your little sis hears your name everyday. She slept with one of your blankets I found last night. You picked a fireball, Conner. That's what I tell Ansley, that her big brother, Conner, handpicked her from the bright pink cloud when he saw her curly brown hair and spunky personality. "She's like me! Mommy would like her." And he recommended her to God so He could put her in my tummy. That explanation will work until she's about 6 or 7. There's some truth to it.
CommentsThe days are flying by. I can't believe its been almost four years since Conner died. When he was alive and thoughts would come into my head about saying in the future, "its been ____years since Conner died" --that used to make me sick to my stomach. The thought of going on and making a life around his death was nauseating. There is not one day, not one hour that I don't think about Conner and Jeff. Hours can go by without thinking of my dad. Abby won't let that happen with Jeff. She is just like him. She said something last night and I laughed so hard. I hadn't laughed that hard since Jeff made me. Since we had the same humor, he knew the things I'd really think were funny. Last night, Abby sounded just like Jeff when he was 8 making the same kind of joke with perfect timing, and I felt like I was 7 again, laughing like a kid. If Jeff would have been there, he would've been laughing so hard he couldn't breathe. Maybe he was there.
CommentsDylan and I are writing today. He's looking at pictures of Conner and wondering who that little boy is. He probably can see that he looks like his cousin Ansley. He'll know someday because we'll keep Conner alive in everyone's memories. Our new little "Jefferson" will be coming into our lives again soon. I wonder if he'll have Jeff's sense of humor and heart and intelligence. I hope so. I hope he doesn't get the addict gene. I hope that for all my grandchildren.
CommentsAnsley was looking at Conner's picture tonight and saying, "Bubba, bub-ba." HOW CUTE! New baby coming. Billy's baby, Jefferson Davis Carlisle, is set to squish out via C-section on April 3!!! We always trade one in when new ones arrive. I am wondering if it will happen. Sort of fatalistic thinking, but its the pattern. Abby's on Spring Break with one grandma then going to other grandma. I miss her already. I love my babies. Love, love.
CommentsApril 3rd is my mom's birthday. Glad to read everyone is doing well. Things are great here. Carson turned 3 on the llth. Time does fly. He is still as sweet and smart as ever. However, we have now entered the "20 questions" phase at my house. Carson responds to EVERY (and I mean every) answer I give him with another question. A typical conversation in my house goes like this: Carson - "Mommy, why do you have to go to work?" Mommy - "To make money"? Carson - "What is money"? Mommy - "It is what pays for our house and clothes and food? Carson - "Why do you have to pay for our house and clothes and food?" It is endless. I didn't know anyone could come up with a question for everything. The funniest part is - it isn't ever just a one word question like why - it always includes what I have just said. In the car today, I was teaching him the "rain, rain, go away" song (it was raining). He kept asking me to repeat it. I kept repeating it thinking he was just trying to learn the words. Then he says, "Mommy, say it again - it is not working". It is so amusing being his mom. Despite all the crap I have been through in past couple years, I am happier than I have ever been. Life is good right now, and I am enjoying it. Let me know when you will be in town again - would love to visit.
CommentsWe were just talking about Ansley getting to the "why" stage. Carson's brilliant, as you know. I know he's good company. I am trying to keep doing what you do with him...lots of talking and adjectives. She is talking and saying little things. She copies everything. Brandon and I love it when she grabs our faces and kisses us. I used to make Conner do that by holding his hands to my cheeks. Anyway, I'd love to see Carson. We're going to the Singing Bean on Friday, and I will be at Billy's all day Sat. Come! Come! Come! I am seriously thinking of leaving Ansley with her grandma for a visit so I can relax and not have to chase her all around their massive compound. BUT, I would miss her and hate for her to miss a visit with her cousins. But, we are going back to see THE BABY next weekend!!!!! Regardless, I will be up. I need to call Lisa B. and see if she could come visit. And maybe I should ask Billy before I invite all my friends and their kids to his home. And, I am happy, too. And, I am happy you're happy.
CommentsJefferson Davis Carlisle has arrived! He was 9 lbs 14 oz. They always have big'uns. I can't believe we have another one!!!! Now its my turn. If things could get settled with Brandon's business, I would love to have ONE more. My body is already stretched out and flabby. I can't wait to hold the new little personality.
CommentsI'm so proud of Abby! She sang for the Pinwheels for Prevention Campaign at the courthouse and she was so mature and good! I know it's hard to believe because I'm her aunt/parent but she is really talented!
CommentsI saw Abby's picture on the front of the Statesboro Herald and she looks beautiful. I wish I could have been there to hear her sing, but I bet she did sound WONDERFUL!!! Maybe when she gets older you can get her on American Idol.
CommentsCheck out the photo page. There's a cute picture of Ansley and a picture of Abby and Michael performing at the courthouse! I'm so proud of my babies-all of them.
CommentsThinking of Conner baby today. Mommy loves you. You are a more than a memory to me, baby. You are a part of everything I think and do. I got your reptile message loud and clear.
CommentsWe are going to see John Edwards in just a couple of weeks. I am excited. I don't need the "medium" to communicate with my loved ones though. I think of each of them during different activities throughout the day. A sad thing though is that I didn't know my dad well enough to know how to relate him to my daily activities. I just wonder which things he helps orchestrate, if any. I think maybe he's Abby's guardian angel. They have that musical connection. In fact, from what I've heard about my dad, they seem to have a lot in common....a natural talent for music, charismatic personality, intelligence, friendly and easy going. I guess he's a part of my everyday life more than I thought. And ole Ansley. She's super silly. The worst thing is that we can't help but laugh when she is the absolute worst. ITS SOOO FUNNY. We hide our faces and give our mean looks when we're really laughing.
CommentsWe've entered a new phase. Ansley has mastered getting out of her crib. Last night, I put her to bed and about 15 minutes later I heard a knocking. I thought it was Abby, and I went back to tell her to be quiet. Abby was sitting quietly in her room, of course, watching tv. Ansley was knocking on her door. When I opened the door, she was so happy to have gotten out and find her freedom. So, she was super frustrated when I put her back in her bed. She slung herself all over her bed and cried and screamed. She was so mad. I cracked her door and went back out to the den. She cried for about 10 minutes, then I heard a little creak and no crying. I tiptoed down the hall and saw her door wide open. Abby had come out in the den with me and Ansley had gone into Abby's room and I watched her pick at some of Abby's stuff until she saw me. I told her to walk out of Abby's room and get back in bed. She hung her head and walked out of Abby's room. When she got to the door and me, she tried to make a run for the den. I caught her and put her back in bed. She, once again, slung herself all around her bed. She has found this wonderful superpower of escape and can't even enjoy it. She eventually fell asleep without escaping again-until about 3 am. She woke up every hour but only got out at 3. I was awake all night wondering if she was going to get out and climb over all the gates or get into the bathrooms or kitchen. So, I was on nightwatch. We're going to have to super babyproof her room and put up 2 gates in the doorway, I guess.
CommentsShe didn't even attempt an escape last night. Good baby.
CommentsAnsley is learning that she has to respect authority. Man, what a lesson. Too bad some of the rest of us didn't learn it that easily. Then again, who knows what's in that little head of hers. She's probably plotting an ultimate escape and you'll wake up with her in the middle of the bed between you and Brandon. Her escape talents remind me of Jeff, when he was 15 months old. He climbed out of the crib, over the gate and down a flight of steep stairs, with his bottle tucked under his arm and walked into the den with a big smile and a "HI, Mommy!" I almost fainted. Just when you think you can sit back and rest, they can surprise you every time. Betsey, I talked to Lew Egnatovitch last night and they are on "baby watch". Maria has started to dialate and could go any day. I know they are very excited.
CommentsNeato. New baby! I spoke too soon. She escaped 12 times last night.
CommentsWell, we went to the John Edward show and Conner came through loud and clear. We get to be on the show. John E. talked about the scar on Conner's leg from his muscle biopsy. He said Conner was a little superhero who touched a lot of peoples' lives in a short amount of time. He said so much that was so true, not just true, that was uniquely Conner and us. He talked about how I took care of Conner and the things I used to say to him. It was nice. Also, we did an interview after the show since only a few get read by John. They interview you for the show and then John Edward does a follow-up at your house. We don't know when the show will air. They'll let us know about him coming out to the house and when it will air. He may not choose us and I guess there is the possibility we could be edited out altogether. But it was a magical experience and very hard to explain. I don't care how it happened, but it happened and it felt good.
CommentsBetsey, That is so AWESOME about the John Edwards/Conner experience. Wow. That's all I know to say. Just WOW! I'm so happy for you. That must have been completely amazing for him to come through so loud and clear. I'm staying pretty busy but loving life right now. Luke & Brayden are five months old now. I can't believe it! Here are a few links to pictures of the boys: http://i35.photobucket.com/albums/d162/ginafimbel/FiveMonthBear5-06.jpg http://i35.photobucket.com/albums/d162/ginafimbel/monkeysee4-06.jpg http://i35.photobucket.com/albums/d162/ginafimbel/boysstroller3-06.jpg http://i35.photobucket.com/albums/d162/ginafimbel/Lukebumbo4-06.jpg http://i35.photobucket.com/albums/d162/ginafimbel/momluke5-06.jpg http://i35.photobucket.com/albums/d162/ginafimbel/BraydenBumbo4-06.jpg http://i35.photobucket.com/albums/d162/ginafimbel/hanginwithdad4-06.jpg I still think of you and your family often. Especially Conner.
CommentsPrecious!! Thank you for putting those links in your message. What a treat! They look so different from each other. I am so happy to see the pictures and hear from you. It's hard work, I know, but a neat adventure. Well Gina, I thought of you when we were there. In fact, I specifically was going to email you and let you know if I didn't end up hearing from you. I did get to state that Conner had SMA type 1 in the follow-up interview so maybe they will put that in the show. I hope so! I would love it if they asked for some pictures and stuff so people could see how sma looks and how the kids have a hard time-BUT-what little heroes they are! I think of you all often, too!
CommentsGina, those boys are ADORABLE! I'm very happy for you and your whole family. I know your little "Booper" is smiling. John Edward reminded Betsey that Conner is fine on the other side - that he is not hampered by the disease over there and is able to "take care" of others. The same goes for Andrew and all of the other angels. Who knew you were in training for twins - wait til they start walking - hope they aren't as hyper as Ansley, but hope they are just as "smart". She's a livewire, but sooooo smart. We adore her.
CommentsWell,I can't wait to hear about the show. I am excited to see what happens. Abby's been crying all evening because today was her last day of school and she's scared she'll have a mean teacher next year. She said she'll never have all those classmates in the same room with the same teacher again. What can you say? Yes, that's right. I just told her change is hard and uncomfortable sometimes. I told her to envision all the fun times as she goes to bed and maybe she'll have good dreams about 2nd grade.
CommentsThe John Edward Show is coming to mom's house!!! I am so excited. They are doing another follow up interview at her house. The producer really wanted to come to Statesboro, but she said they would be in Atlanta and Monroe is closer. I just think it is so neat. It will allow me a chance to educate people about sma!!!!
CommentsWell, now the show is coming to Statesboro. They want to see Conner's Place. I am so very excited. I can't even stand it.
CommentsHey Everybody, Been a while since I've said much but I do keep up ya'll. Want to tell everybody hey. Even ya'll I don't know. I hope everybody's doin' well. I look forward to John Edwards too. Hey John and Gina. I hope ya'll are really doin' great. Love, John
CommentsI found out last night that Cassidy Swanson passed away Friday. Her service was held today at 2pm. Her life was celebrated with songs and balloons, but it was heartbreaking for Skylar, her twin sister, and her family who had her spirit clearly and tangibly within their possession only days ago. Of course we know that her spirit, like Conner's, "will always be with us," but that really doesn't make you feel any better at the time. It helps me now knowing that Conner is with me, but it didn't when he first died because the whole situation with his sickness and death just pissed me off deep down. No amount of greater good was good enough for me. I only cared about how Conner suffered, not how other's would learn from it. I didn't care to sacrifice my child in a cruel and suffering manner in order for other's to learn. I can't say that I feel it was worth that now, but I CAN say that I am proud of my son and how he handled his precious little life. If others learned from that, then I am even more proud. I am guessing that the pain and broken heart as well as the pride run deep in parents who lose sma kids. I continue to feel that Conner is alive, but not in the way I'd design it, and there is not a damn thing I can do about it. I can only keep him alive in the way God will allow me to do it. I am alive and I can speak.
CommentsYesterday was Father's Day and a very special day in Statesboro for Conner's family. One of the producer's from the John Edward Show and two cameramen came to Betsey's house and to Conner's Place to film footage to be used in a segment of the show in the future. We excited to have an opportunity to talk about Conner and about our other family members who are with him "on the other side". John was with us as well as Irene and her daughter. Betsey was in her element reliving the good and sad moments of Conner's life on earth and appreciating what he meant to our family and to so many others. Nothing will bring our loved ones back, but we want to know that they are "all right" and that the suffering is over - for them, at least. If we have to continue to suffer from the loss, that is our path to follow. Our answers about eternity will come in the future, but this was like getting a glimpse of that time.
CommentsSunday was stressful. It was harder than I thought to really get back into the details about life when Conner was alive. I knew that was my chance to get the information out about sma and I felt pressure to say what was important. Of course, I feel I could've included better stuff, but I did the best I could. I hope it turns out okay and is helpful for other people. I just want to be effective in some way.
CommentsBETSEY BRANDON AND ABBY AND ANSLEY GOTING SO BIG AND I CAN,T BELIVE IT AND I CAN,T BELIVE THAT JOHAN I SEE HIM SOMETIME AT THE GYM AND IT IS SO NICE TO HAVE FRIENDS LIKE HIM AND YOU ALL BETSEY E-M ME SOME PICTURE OF THE KIDS TO E-M ME BACK JENNIFER
CommentsThis past week was a little depressing. There are always those times and then they pass. So, I just keep doing the days until they pass. Tomorrow is Brandon's birthday. We'll have a little celebration. He's 8 years younger than me, so I can't tease him about getting old. Things are already better, though. I think I have just been a little stressed with work and stuff. But, that's what I've always wanted-to worry about normal things. And that's what I have-all the worries that everyone else has...bills, kids, balance, obligations, etc. I can't complain. My appreciation for it doesn't make it any less stressful though.
CommentsSorry to hear about your down time, Betsey. I could tell you didn't sound too "chipper" the past couple of days. Wish you could have been with me and "the girls". Elaine and I enjoyed our trip to Hilton Head. We don't get to spend enough time alone just talking about the past 40 years since we first met. Looking forward to next Sunday and Pop Pop's anniversary party -65 years. He's getting excited and wants me to go over and talk to the caterers with him this week. Today I take Abby back. I'll enjoy having time to chat with her. I haven't spent much time with her this summer yet, but I've wanted her to have fun and Billy's house is more fun than mine. Hope I'll be able to enjoy Ansley this weekend.
CommentsI feel SO MUCH better. I am rested. How I feel is usually directly related to whether or not the baby is doing okay. So, I don't know when the show is going to be on, but I guess we'll find out when they know. Neato. I hope they edit out all my moronic moments. I enjoyed having Lauren here all last week. She didn't like my rules about everything too much, but she obeyed and I gave her a score of a 90. It's as hard to care for a teenager as it is Ansley. Instead of screaming and crying in the crib at bedtime, I am trying to get her to turn off that kingdom hearts playstation game. Just like having to keep putting Ansley back in her bed, I had to keep saying, "Turn off the game. Turn off the game. Turn off the game." Now Abby on the other hand is a breeze. Just say, "Good night," and she gives hugs and kisses and goes to sleep immediately.
Commentsheraus jetzt - I think we are a message board for a different group now.
CommentsThat looks a little germanic, but with a twist. Ich bin klein, mein wunch ist klein etc. Oh well, just as long as it's not dirty, they can use our "medium" to communicate. I have Dylan and Davis today. Shannon is not feeling well. Hope she will be better soon and it's just a simple "bug". She is a very valuable person to three little boys, a teenager and a grown man. Not to speak of the rest of us who need and value her services. She needs to feel good for their beach trip. I know Billy is looking forward to a week's rest after this busy week of work.
CommentsHi everyone. Glad to hear everyone is doing well. I would love to see the show about Conner. Do you know when it will be on TV? I am staying busy working with my babies. You all sound busy too. I would love to see Ansley and Abbey one day. I am so happy for you all. Belinda
CommentsHey Belinda. Good to hear from you!! I don't know when the show will be on. If I find out I will let you know. The producer said a week or so ago that she was putting it together and it was coming along nicely. So, maybe we'll hear. I'll post it here if I find out. Abby and Ansley are growing up very fast. Ansley is saying all kinds of things. She has even started saying sh--. She got that from me, I hate to say. I must change my aggravation expletive to something less embarrassing. Abby and I were practicing saying "fudge" and "fiddlesticks." Although when Ansley tries to repeat "fudge," it will probably be more embarrassing than if she was saying sh%*.
CommentsThinking of my little angel on his birthday. Happy Birthday little man! Hope there's a big celebration in heaven today with lots of fun people around, singing happy birthday and feeding you too much cake and ice cream. I love you and think of you everyday.
CommentsHappy Birthday, Conner. I was wondering what things would happen today to force me to think you were sending "hey" messages. I've got one so far. What else? I'll be paying attention. Love, love.
CommentsHey Ya'll. Betsey, what signs did you get from Conner on his birthday?
CommentsContacted Jodi with the John Edward Show and she said that she did a great job on it and that she thinks it will air on August 25. Remember, it's at 10:00PM on WE. I plan to tape, but want others to also in case mine messes up. Can't wait to see it. How are you John?(and Daniel and Jim and Sonny?) John, I think Jodi was a little "taken" with you. didn't you like her?
CommentsThe spam is getting dirty on here.
CommentsWe are all good. I ate with Daddy and Nancy last night. Thanks for informing us on the show. I look forward to seeing it. And I look forward to seeing you again, please let me know when ya'll are planning to come down again. And I can't say that I was "taken" with Jodi, I think the word is "smitten".
CommentsOh yeah, "smitten". I like that word alot. That says it all without saying too much. Glad everyone is doing well. I'm sure I'll be back that way soon. With school being right around the corner, I'll have to go south to see Abby (and Ansley) and I miss them when I don't see them at least every couple of weeks.
CommentsY'all are so silly. I'm sure Conner's smiling. So Ansley is falling into Conner's footsteps with her love of veggietales (although I know its a toddler favorite). She also likes to play with Abby's drumsticks and practice pad. I think she may be our drummer and Abby our guitar player. Brandon and I are the audience members.
CommentsTime to talk to the "spam" gurus. What the heck? I have been enjoying my "old" and I do mean old friends this summer. Just got back from NC and loved Southport. I'm still working on my "blog". I need much more tech info before I can share it. Hope everyone is well. How's MaMa, John? Give her my love. Pop Pop is going to be 89 on August 27 and he wants a party. So I guess I'll have a cookout here for him. He's a sport. My love to all. I miss Abby and Ansley. School tomorrow!!
CommentsDid I say 89? I meant 90! So,I'm planning a cookout here. Billy will be in Key West so I'll have some little boys with me and maybe Lauren, too. Betsey, hoping you and family will show up. There will be good food and interesting people - some friends from the "past". And anyone else who wants to come. I have Dylan again today. I went to swim at Billy's yesterday and it's very hard for me to leave without him. He cries and points to the door, so I have to take him with me. Gary was very happy to see him, as usual. Little boys are so sweet! Little girls are, too.
CommentsWell, Ansley is loving Elmo as much as Conner, just a little later. Conner was already over Elmo by this time. She did watch Babe for the first time, I think, yesterday. She liked it for a little while. She likes the animals. As far as elmo, she says, I want elmo, but it sounds like, ah-malmo.
CommentsAnsley pee peed in her potty and wiped! We were very impressed. She peed on the floor three times yesterday. We can't keep a diaper on her. I tried putting on panties, but she takes those off, too. In fact, she strips completely as soon as she gets home. Abby is starting her guitar lessons tomorrow. She is very excited. She also gets a beautiful, real guitar to use. Its an acoustic guitar, and it sounds beautiful. She starts the Statesboro Youth Chorale next week. She starts in the resident choir first. I think she is building a smart foundation for her love of music. She has excellent teachers with Dr. Braz and Chris Mitchell. I'm so proud of my new pee-er and my guitar playing singer/songwriter.
CommentsAnd I thought when Conner died that the repetitive Elmo videos were over. I have watched Babe and Elmo in Grouchland and The Best of Elmo over and over and over. Ansley was sick Thursday and Fri. so I had to stay home with her and then all day today, of course. And she got a new monkey from Claire's today. I thought it would be cute if she named it Drew since I knew she could say that name perfectly. Ansley decided to call the monkey, "E.E." because, monkeys say, "eeeeh...eeeeeh," you know? So, the pink monkey is EE. Abby has her friend over spending the night. She's in heaven. They put on makeup, jumped on the trampoline, ate pizza, did a puppet show, and I have no idea what they are doing now. As long as they don't wake up Ansley, its fine. Since Ansley is sick, I have to rock her and give her a little more attention at night. And when I'm sitting in the dark room rocking her while she is draped across me, I think about when Conner was sicker than his usual sickness and how I wished I could just pick him up and rock him. It is so satisfying to be able to do that with Ansley. I feel like just holding her close makes her feel a little better. I would do that with Conner, but I never felt like I could get close enough without him strangling or being uncomfortable. And I hated that he missed out on that. I pretend when I'm holding her so close that its him (for a moment) and I thank God for having that.
CommentsAnd sometimes when I'm watching something funny on TV, I pretend that Jeff is in the den watching it, too and I can call out to him and say "did you see that?" and we can laugh together again. Loss is hell and life is good, but memories can be both good and bad. Hang on and enjoy the good and survive the bad. I like to think that Conner and Jeff are watching - contrary to what some people think - and that they are telling us to love each other and not to worry that they can't be with us.
CommentsHey everybody, tell MeMa and PopPop Happy Anniversary (I'm a little late with that) and Happy Birthday to Pop Pop. My grandmother is just fine. I spent the weekend with MaMa. We went to Warner Robins Sunday and bought her a digital camera (at her request). I told her she had just entered the digital age and she said "what?" Tell everybody I said hey and send some pictures.
CommentsI saw the "promo" for the John Edward Show last night on WE. There is going to be a good bit about Conner and Betsey, John, etc. I'm sure that SMA will be talked about and that will help to get the message out there for those who are like we used to be - totally in the dark about a devastating disease that takes the lives of little innocent babies. It will be a chance for Conner to "speak" and help others to be aware of his life and our love and loss of our Little Man.
CommentsCool. Its sad to revisit it, but it will be good. Go to http://johnedward.we.tv/episode9.html and click on view video above the little screen to the right and it shows the commercial for the show. Abby says it makes her want to cry.
CommentsI can't wait until the show on Friday (my Tivo is already set to record it!). But wow, this will be hard revisiting it, huh? I know you know better than I do but just watching the promo kills me. I know our Angels don't want us to be sad though so I'm trying not to be. It's easier with Luke & Brayden to focus on. Anyway, this has to be quick but I wanted to check in. Love, Gina
CommentsThat was really neat. I hope it helped people. I know it helped me!
CommentsI saw you on john edwards and i thought of my friend amy that lost her baby from sma too. Her daughters name is Lindsey Ronningen she is on the sma angels. Conner is so cute i think he kind of looks like lindsey. My heart is with you. Alyssa
CommentsI just saw Conner's Mom on the John Edwards TV show. I was stuck by her grace, positive energy and love of life; even after such a devastating loss. She is so full of love. She has inspired me to keep going with love and grace, even after the things that I have suffered in my life, which don't approach the loss she has suffered. God bless her, Conner and his Dad.
CommentsWell, the show turned out very good. I was very proud of Betsey. She's a good mommy and a good person. The next show I want to do is "Extreme Makeover" - Man do I need a FACELIFT. Oh well, at my age, one must expect to look, well, my age. We have gotten a great response and I am so glad that this may have brought awareness of SMA to some people who would not otherwise have known about it. It's a terrible disease that, I believe, can be cured with enough research and research takes money and money will only come from awareness of the disease and people it strikes. Love to the Riggs family.
CommentsThe show was great. I cried pretty much through your entire part. And for a long time afterwards. It was cathartic though. You are such a good mom, Betsey. And you were such a good dad too, John. You both still are. You will always be Conner's mommy and daddy - but now he's taking care of you instead of you taking care of him. You are a very inspirational family. You too, Sandee. I know it's cheesy but I'm so proud to "know" all of you! Thank you for sharing your lives. Andrew would have been six yesterday. I really can't believe that. SIX. My little boy is not so little. take care you guys. Gina
CommentsHi Betsey! WOW- I didn't even know you were going to be on John Edwards' show- (i tivo it). i am sure you can imagine my shock when i saw- i can't even begin to explain how incredibly painful it was to watch but i watched and cried and cried some more. i was very moved by the part where he said he didn't feel that this child was "sick" and also by the superhero part and also by how much he loved his daddy etc.. i am welling up just writing this- also, i have to say that we always felt the same about not wanting to ever see our child suffering or going through some horrific hospital visit that ends badly.. when you spoke about what was to happen and the little bit that you Could control- nurses, not calling 911 etc.. it was like i was hearing myself speak. you are a role model, a FANTASTIC mom and don't ever doubt yourself- i am sure that you don't but we all have bad days & remember- you were Conners mom for a reason- he was a gift to you that most people do not get- and while that gift comes with a ridiculous price to pay- his being yours is still- a GIFT. these are my thoughts- i hope you are as good as possible and i am always wishing you signs ( i have gotten some from Payton thank goodness) from Conner and good things.. Debbie Freeman mom to angel Payton James Freeman July 14, 2000- January 15, 2006
CommentsI am so glad to hear from you and I want to respond on your message board. I cried for you and your family as I read the news about Payton. Of course, I could empathize as I know you do hearing about Conner. I know when I watched the John Edward Show when Conner was alive, I could empathize with every parent on that had lost a child. I craved hearing what their feelings were and how they were doing and they lived each day. I also wanted hope that I could still feel connected to Conner. I think that is the best thing about that show is that it helps you have hope that you are still connected. You just want something to make it easier-you're desperate to find something to ease the pain and loss-and feeling connected does that for me. I hope others were able to feel connected to their babies by watching the show. Thanks for writing!
CommentsWell, I received a lot of nice emails from people who watched the show. Also, people in town were really nice about telling me they watched the show. Anyway, Conner keeps on helping other people!! So, Abby is doing really well with her guitar playing. I am so impressed. She makes her guitar sound so pretty-like music. She's learning Van Morrison's, Brown Eyed Girl. That is so cool to me. And Ansley! She is a funny girl. I almost hate to think of having another baby because that would make Ansley the middle child. Ansley is bad enough prior to being cursed with "middle child syndrome." She'd be doomed. She hid Brandon's keys the other day, as we watched her, and went back up to him, in character, and said, "Daddy, where's keys? where's keys, daddy?" Hmmm, Ansley are they in there. "Dare hidin' Daddy! Dare hidin'!" So cute.
CommentsI miss Ansley and Abby. Haven't been able to take one of my "quick trips" in awhile. Shannon had surgery - partial hysterectomy on Friday and is home now. She's pretty sore and uncomfortable, so Gary and I have been helping with Dylan and Davis. they are soo cute, but they have more energy than two old grandparents. I'm trying to rise to the occasion. I just don't do anything but feed them, change them, bathe them and play with them. My house is a mess. But the day after they leave, the house will be back to normal and I'll miss the little guys. Dylan had his two year old "birthday" on Sunday. We got cake, ice cream and presents for him. He cried when we sang "Happy Birthday". It seemed to scare him. I'm getting used to 5 interrupted hours of sleep.
CommentsThanks to Laura Stants for "cleaning" up our page again. Hope all is well with everyone. I've been up to my ears in babies (and loving it). I miss them when they go home. Hope to see Ansley and Abby this weekend. Also, Karen is coming over and we are going to work on my book. I'm almost ready to submit to someone and see if it has any merit at all. I need input from the kids and help choosing pictures, etc. It's been intense and interesting writing it all these years, now we'll see if it means anything to anyone except me.
CommentsI saw Betsy on John Edwards, I was unable to watch all of it. I was curious how this beautiful child went with God. My heart sank when I found this. My nephew died two years ago from SMA. It lifts my heart knowing how close a cure is..but my stomach turns knowing that the one thing holding it back is money. But, I know that Spencer Petrina is with God and your little Conner. Best wishes and God Bless Lizebeth Petrina
CommentsThanks for writing. I appreciate the comments. We are so thankful that Conner passed calmly and not in the scary ways that he could have. It is so sad to think about all of it. It just makes me sad and exhausted thinking about the emotional toll it took in dealing with the disease and everything. Anyway, Ansley is sick and has been crying for a couple of days. I am exhausted. But, we have medicine! So, maybe she will sleep tonight. Even though I'm tired, I am excited because a new business partner and I are opening a driving school because of the new Joshua's Law starting in January. I love starting new businesses. Its probably a distraction so I don't have to "deal" with the losses of the past. Or I just like adventure and risk. Hmm.
CommentsI had a dream about Conner last night. Maybe it was a reminder to appreciate Ansley even when she's not sleeping, acting super bratty, and being very frustrating. She's already freaked out at least three times this morning, thrown her "water" (I want juice!, she said), and hit me in the face when I kissed her tummy. Oh, the joys of having a two year old. However, after my dream about Conner, I woke up better able to appreciate all of her aggravation because she is not suffering. I can deal with any of it as long as I know she is going to live through the day with no worries. I'll sleep eventually. Ugh. The snotty princess is calling her peasant, now, so I must go serve ma-lady or she'll destroy her surroundings and face a time out from movie watching or playing (its like her visit to the dungeon).
CommentsLife is great. Ansley slept from the time she went to bed until Brandon's car alarm went off at 7 am. I had a full 8 hours for the first time since I don't remember. Lovely.
CommentsI miss my girls after my visit with them this past weekend. Ansley is a love, but she can keep you you running. She and "Deeyan" (that's how she says Dylan) had a ball together. They could do some serious damage if they were together all the time. I think they are amazed that there's another little person who like to do all the same crazy things they do. When Ansley does something "bad", Dylan just looks at you like he wants to say, "Well, are you going to do anything about that?" I'm still looking for things they "hid" while they were here. Finding cheese under the sofa and sippy cups behind the bed. Don't know if I'll ever find the "Cat in the Hat" dvd...but I'll keep trying. Lauren, with the help of Drew and Abby, made fudge from my mom's old recipe and it was yummy!
CommentsOh my goodness. I feel horrible today. Not physically, but I feel so emotionally drained for no good reason that I can think of. I guess those days just pop up. Good thing I didn't have work stuff to do. Well, actually I did and I had baby all day long, too. But I got everything done despite my mental drag. I think I would have much more depressed if I didn't have Ansley to distract me. I don't know why. I should go back and see if there is a pattern to the times on this journal where I say I'm feeling depressed. Maybe, just maybe, I am depressed because it was Ansley's birthday and it made me miss Conner. That would not be a conscious thing, but I could see how that would be. Those things happen. Anytime I hear of a sick child or dying child, I don't get sad, I get in a really bad mood and aggravated. And then I talk about it to Brandon, and he helps me feel better by making me realize why I am feeling like I am. So, I guess Brandon has taught me well and I guess maybe there may be a connection. But I feel guilty feeling bad during a happy time for my sweet, little girl. I just miss Conner everyday and it hurts more on some days than others. I am so happy I have two healthy girls, but it just really doesn't take away the pain that gets buried sometimes. Today will pass and tomorrow will be better. I know that. So, I will hug Abby, Ansley and Brandon and all will be just fine! Time does handle a lot, but its not a cure.
CommentsI am excited about the girls' birthday party this weekend. If anyone is reading this that I didn't invite, you are invited. It's Sat., 4-6. I did invitations and then just told people instead of sending them. Anyway, Brandon is moving the old gym into the new gym location this weekend. We've got a lot of stuff to do this week. Okay, good night. Abby's present from us is having a teenager take her shopping. In other words, she is getting a teenager's judgment while she shops instead of my "mom" judgment. But, I trust Ashley's taste or we wouldn't have suggested it. So, I'm excited for Abby. She is so excited! Birthday week is one long week of excitement. We are getting a wagon for Ansley. I think Abby and Brandon are picking that out. Okay, another long day tomorrow.
CommentsLauren and I are going down to Statesboro tomorrow for the "joint" birthday party for Abby and Ansley. I took Dylan and Davis home to their mommy yesterday when she got home from the hospital. She's still uncomfortable from the infection but doing much better. Those little boys really light up your life. You just need help and Lauren is good for that - if strongly persuaded. Today I'll clean my house and then go looking for birthday presents for the girls. I'm sending out book proposals, also. So I'll try to get a couple sent out today. Can't wait to get my hands on those sweet girls - Abby, Ansley and Betsey!
CommentsThe party was a success. Abby and Ansley were both very pleased with everything. Enjoyed being with Betsey, Abby, Lauren, and Ansley. Getting the girls together was good. Abby and Lauren always get sad when they have to part, but they know there will be more good times for them. I get sad leaving Betsey but hope things will get a little less crazy for her soon. Brandon was moving the gym all weekend so he was exhausted and stressed out and Betsey was a little stressed also, but things will improve when both of their businesses are less unstable. It takes time.
Commentsspam spam spam I enjoyed the party and the girls were grateful and sweet. Ansley WON'T sleep though and it is driving me nuts. I can't function, I am so tired. It reminds me of the Conner days. I can't complain too much because I know it will pass. I just wish it'd go ahead and pass. She just won't stay asleep. I fussed at her last night and said, no ba-ba, no daddy, go to sleep, good night I love you! and I yelled at the dog to shut up and went to bed. That was after the 2nd or 3rd wake up at about 3:30 am. I was and am so tired. If only I could have one night where I laid my head down at 10 pm and didn't wake up until 8 am. What heaven that would be. It would happen so quick I wouldn't even be able to cherish it. Oh, how nice. Okay, gotta go work.
CommentsI laid my head down at 10 last night and didn't wake up until 7:30 am. It WAS heaven! I had told Ansley before I put her to bed that no matter what, she would not be allowed to come to our bed or Abby's bed. No middle of the night ba-ba's, just sleep! And, maybe coincidentally, it worked.
CommentsNice weekend. Friday we relaxed. Saturday we went to the movies. And Abby and I went to a little concert at the Emma Kelly theater. Her music teacher at Pladd Dot Music was playing. There were also some other people there. They were all so talented. It was called the American Music Series. Today I watched some footage of Conner. I have a hard time with that. I was watching me bathe him and all I could think was how cold he must have been. I just beat myself up watching those videos. I think "cover him" or "don't suction so long" or turn him or kiss him or prop him up or put his bipap on or adjust it or "look at him, he's trying to get your attention." Its endless. I just can't stand it. Anyway, I feel his pain and suffering all over again when I watch the videos. It is hard. I am living my life and I'm happy, but I just can't ever forget his pain. I love his sweetness and his bravery. He was a such a sweet, perfect baby-as far as I knew. And Abby and Ansley have their own perfections. And I enjoy those experiences. Abby is such a determined hardworker. And Ansley is just determined. I read that ambition and success is the result of energy + determination. I think they have that covered.
CommentsTomorrow is Jeff's "angel birthday." I wonder if he's in peace. I wonder if he's still working on issues he had. I guess I just was taking for granted that when you die, you have a better understanding and all knowledge and peace. But, maybe he has stuff to work on that excludes the physical related burdens. Maybe there are burdens on his soul that he has to reconcile. So now that makes me wonder if he has found peace. I hope so. I would think it would just be peaceful in Heaven just knowing about Abby and her God given talents and knowing that he produced that. I don't just wonder about that. I really think about it a lot. Just one more thought, one more concern to keep me up at night. I guess I need to work on some peace. So, I'll go peek in on Ansley and kiss her cheek and that should do it.
CommentsYes, today is the two year mark of losing my son. It's raining and I know that God is sad for us as we are for ourselves. I miss even more than ever because I know that he is gone for good. The memories and pictures and videos are all I have now. Well, not really. I have Abby and she is so much a part of him - the best part. He knew it and was so proud of her. I'm working on a memorial site for him. I need to know more about downloading music. I want to have "Sweet Carlisle" playing on it so that everyone can hear the beauty of the song written just for him. I'm feeling sad today, but no sadder than any other day. It's just hard to not have him here on this earth every single day.
CommentsThere was so much spam. Thank you, Laura, for removing it. Well, I can't help but get that seasonal depression, HOWEVER, it doesn't mean I am not in the spirit of the holidays. I love it for the kids and it's nice that people are nicer around the holidays, but I just can't help but feel a little depressed deep down around this time of year. I am very excited, though, because the "Conner's Place Driving School" is getting very close to be licensed. I have turned in everything, my instructors are being trained in a couple of weeks, and we are putting the brake on our student car and maybe only minor details follow. So, maybe we'll get started in Jan. or Feb. There are more and more services being provided in Conner's name, and I am so proud. I can't wait to open more schools! AND, Abby is doing so well with her guitar. I never wrote about Abby playing at open mic night. She wrote a song, played guitar and sang her song at the Midtown Coffeehouse. She was so incredible. She's a very talented guitarist in such a short period of time. And she wrote a very catchy, cool, properly structured song. I couldn't cry because I was so nauseatingly nervous for her. She was as "cool as a cucumber," as my mom would say. And Ansley is talking like crazy. She makes needs known. Her daddy says, she is not passive-aggressive, she is just aggressive. No, she is very assertive. She gets what she wants, but, unfortunately for her, she get disciplined for her techniques at times. She loves her daddy and sissy. She copies everything she hears. She sits at the table with us now. No more high chair. Ansley is determined and resourceful-qualities I admire. Those are the traits of success. I admire Ansley and Abby both because they have loads of energy.
CommentsHappy Birthday to Jeff. He would be 37 today.
Commentsi have been thinking about you. you have been on my mind for years for a matter of fact. i as gonna type more but i have to go to bed. i love you sooooooo much! i will type tommorrow. = )
CommentsHi my little Angel, I miss you. I wish you were here to see the tree lights and all the excitement of Christmas. We tried so hard to make your Christmases as fun and they could be, but you just weren't with us long enough to really anticipate the fun. I miss those sweet eyes that followed us everywhere in the room. I miss watching your mommy caring for you with so much love. She was always a nuturing and loving person, but you made that come out even more. You helped to make your mommy and your daddy the loving people they are. We all appreciate little things more for having to watch you struggle for each breath. I hope you are giggling and excited as Christmas approaches and I hope Uncle Jeff and Granddaddy Bill and Grandma Connie are spoiling you with attention. I'll always love you and remember you, my second grandson.
CommentsI hope that you're doing well. I will be praying for you.
CommentsChristmas is always a little hard because it brings memories of being in the hospital with Conner. I hated Conner being in the hospital. However, on the good side, its the first Christmas that Ansley really knows what's going on. She talks about Santa and wants to open presents. She cried over and over today, "shopping.....shopping.....shopping!!!" when we left the store. That was funny. I wanted to celebrate Christmas for Conner by giving some stuff to Safe Haven and other kids in domestic violence situations. It'll be donated in Conner's name. Mom's giving a scooter. LisaD. is mailing some something. My father-in-law is donating. My business partner is excited about donating teddy bears. I am so happy at the response. I hope this makes Conner smile. I think it enriches his soul and his spirit by helping other kids that may still be suffering. If anyone else is interested in donating in his name, email me! I love you, Conner. I think of you everyday, with every move I make.
CommentsFor Christmas, Lauren, Abby and Drew made a new website for Conner. It's at Memory-of.com. Just enter that and when you get to the main directory, enter Conner Riggs and you can see their efforts and add to the information. It was a "gift" for Betsey and will be there for everyone to enjoy. If you have trouble finding it, email me and I'll send the link to you. There is also a site for Jeff at the same location. We want our loved ones to be remembered by all those who miss them and will always hold them in their hearts. It's very sad when no one says their names any more, so we don't want that to happen with those we love.
CommentsHappy New Year to all, especially our Riggs family loved ones. Hope you have had a chance to check out Jeff and Conner's websites. They are http://conner-riggs.memory-of.com/ and http://jeff-carlisle.memory-of.com/ Hope everyone is doing well.
CommentsConner's Place Driving School has now been licensed! A present to Conner.
CommentsWe also have customers now! I am excited! Its no good having a business if you don't have customers. you can see our website www.connersplace.org
CommentsWe also have customers now! I am excited! Its no good having a business if you don't have customers. you can see our website www.connersplace.org
Commentsinternet roulette aav internet roulette http://hometown.aol.com/babydaniell/internet-roulette.html party poker bonus code aav party poker bonus code http://hometown.aol.com/badedanton/party-poker-bonus-code.html video poker aav video poker http://hometown.aol.com/babydaniell/video-poker-online.html party poker deposit aav party poker deposit http://hometown.aol.com/badedanton/party-poker-deposit-bonus.html texas holdem aav texas holdem http://play-texas-holdem.html black jack aav black jack http://hometown.aol.com/babydaniell/black-jack.html black jack aav black jack http://hometown.aol.com/babydaniell/play-black-jack.html online aav online http://hometown.aol.com/babydaniell/play-roulette-online.html
CommentsHappy Valentine's Day, Conner! Love you and thinking of you everyday.
Commentsphentermine on sale asb phentermine on sale http://hometown.aol.com/tilonski/phentermine-on-sale.html purchase phentermine asb purchase phentermine http://hometown.aol.com/eldie27/purchase-phentermine.html phentermine adipex asb phentermine adipex http://hometown.aol.com/eldie27/phentermine-adipex.html phentermine pharmacy asb phentermine pharmacy http://hometown.aol.com/eldie27/phentermine-pharmacy.html 90.00 phentermine asb 90.00 phentermine http://hometown.aol.com/tilonski/90-phentermine.html buy phentermine online asb buy phentermine online http://hometown.aol.com/eldie27/buy-phentermine-online.html phentermine on line asb phentermine on line http://hometown.aol.com/tilonski/phentermine-on-line.html order phentermine asb order phentermine http://hometown.aol.com/eldie27/order-phentermine.html
Commentsphentermine no prescription anx phentermine no prescription http://phenterminenoprescriptioncc.blogspot.com phentermine no prescription anx phentermine no prescription http://phenterminenoprescriptioncc.blogspot.com phentermine no prescription online anx phentermine no prescription online http://phenterminenoprescriptioncc.blogspot.com cheap phentermine anx cheap phentermine http://cheapphenterminerr.blogspot.com cheap phentermine anx cheap phentermine http://cheapphenterminerr.blogspot.com cheap phentermine online anx cheap phentermine online http://cheapphenterminerr.blogspot.com phentermine online anx phentermine online http://phentermineonlineyk.blogspot.com phentermine online anx phentermine online http://phentermineonlineyk.blogspot.com
Commentstv dish network qs tv dish network http://www.foroswebgratis.com/foro-Tema.php?id_foro=79864 digital satellite tv qs digital satellite tv http://www.foroswebgratis.com/foro-Tema.php?id_foro=79867 digital satellite tv qs digital satellite tv http://www.foroswebgratis.com/foro-Tema.php?id_foro=79867 digital satellite tv qs digital satellite tv http://www.foroswebgratis.com/foro-Tema.php?id_foro=79867 digital satellite qs digital satellite http://www.foroswebgratis.com/foro-Tema.php?id_foro=79867 digital qs digital http://www.foroswebgratis.com/foro-Tema.php?id_foro=79867 satellite tv qs satellite tv http://www.foroswebgratis.com/foro-Tema.php?id_foro=79867 dish network tv qs dish network tv http://www.foroswebgratis.com/foro-Tema.php?id_foro=79866
Commentsphentermine no prescription wsv phentermine no prescription http://phenterminenoprescriptioncc.blogspot.com phentermine no prescription wsv phentermine no prescription http://phenterminenoprescriptioncc.blogspot.com phentermine no prescription online wsv phentermine no prescription online http://phenterminenoprescriptioncc.blogspot.com cheap phentermine wsv cheap phentermine http://cheapphenterminerr.blogspot.com cheap phentermine wsv cheap phentermine http://cheapphenterminerr.blogspot.com cheap phentermine online wsv cheap phentermine online http://cheapphenterminerr.blogspot.com phentermine online wsv phentermine online http://phentermineonlineyk.blogspot.com phentermine online wsv phentermine online http://phentermineonlineyk.blogspot.com
Commentsphentermine no prescription qvs phentermine no prescription http://phenterminenoprescriptioncc.blogspot.com phentermine no prescription qvs phentermine no prescription http://phenterminenoprescriptioncc.blogspot.com phentermine no prescription online qvs phentermine no prescription online http://phenterminenoprescriptioncc.blogspot.com cheap phentermine qvs cheap phentermine |
